This is my mother. She left me when I was just 14 years old. I saw her a few times from teenage through the typical college years (although I didn’t have typical college years) and then she passed away before I married or had children. She was a wonderful woman that I know I would talk to her often if she were alive, but I really never got the chance.

The most current entries are things I would tell her and only her ... because they aren’t meant to be heard, just vented (if she were alive). The majority of this blog are letters she wrote to me (and a few to my sisters) during the years that we were apart.

Sunday, April 8, 1984

April 8, 1984

Dear Betsy,

Thank you for the beautiful Easter card and lovely Get well card.  I look at them all the time.  My feet are still sore but slowly getting there.  I now eat three meals a day and had cake and ice cream for dessert.  I get up at 9 am and have to take 13 pills plus many more all day long.  Ihave gained 6# now and this is the limit.  The church provided supper night this week and all Saint's Lutheran brought in my lunch every day so far.
I lost my big toe nail last night and the remains looks terrible.  Dr Lopez was supposed to come today.  It is 7 pm and no doctor so far.  I really like him and he is good to me.  My disease  is so rare and he studies it.
Grandma has done the dishes every day and Grandpa got groceries.  He also got gas in my car.
The apartment is just darling.  I have their really beautiful hide-a-way bed, an orange (dark) chair and 2 tables and a lamp.
Smokie is gone.  The funny think is that I really don't miss him so much.  He has a good home.
I have had lots of friends over. (I am fally asleep writing this)
Later
I am awake now.  Dr. Lopez hasn't come.  Grandma and Grandpa were just here.  She did my dishes for me.  They got your card and letter.  Please write Aunt Ida to thank her for the $10. She looks for a letter and wallet picture of you.  Could you please send me another wallet also so I can have some extras made.
You sound happy at Heidi's.  Did you go to Social services?  My soc. sec. number is … You should have had money as payee for yourself for March, April, May and June.
What are your plans for the summer?  I hope you do come and see me.
Well, I am out of news.  I have to soak my feet before I go to bed in cool water before I go to bed.  Remember I lov eyou so very much.  I miss you also.  Take care of yourself.  Keep me in your thoughts.
All my deepest love,
Your mom

April 9
So sorry you had an asthma attack.  I am glad it got better and your tummy also.  You should have had those cokes…especially during an attack.  Enclosed is a check for $5.  It isn't much but get what you need.  Don't ever be afraid to go to the hospital for care as someone will help you.  Have faith, honey.  I am glad David and his dad were so helpful.  Thank them for me.  Think about your future.  I love you.  Take care.  I'll look for the Bentyl and some Eurythromycin to have on hand.  Tell Sandy her letter is coming.  Tell no one about the $5.  Just between you and me.  All my love to a good daughter.

I love you,
Mommy

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