This is my mother. She left me when I was just 14 years old. I saw her a few times from teenage through the typical college years (although I didn’t have typical college years) and then she passed away before I married or had children. She was a wonderful woman that I know I would talk to her often if she were alive, but I really never got the chance.

The most current entries are things I would tell her and only her ... because they aren’t meant to be heard, just vented (if she were alive). The majority of this blog are letters she wrote to me (and a few to my sisters) during the years that we were apart.

Wednesday, March 4, 1987

March 4, 1987

Dear Betsy,
Well, here is March.  I understand you called Sandy last night.  She is so excited about getting married.  I am so happy for her.  I called her at 6:00 her time this morning.  Of course I woke her up.  I am going to Provo on April 2nd from Detroit and l will leave April 5th.  I hope you and Kirstie go.  I want to see you.  How are you?  Betsy, I go to bed early now and up at 6 am. So call me anytime before 8 am.  It is cheap then.  I am going to wear a powder blue dress with white in it.  I hope you like it.
I am at MCO Clinic and hospital.  I saw Dr. Hageman, my cardiovascular doctor.  He took my left big toe nail off and cut the right one way down.  They die with fungus because of the poor circulation.  I fell on my left knee three months ago and it has a  bump on it.  He thought it was a cyst and tried to aspirate it.  I had a little blood but no fluid.  I rode an exercise bike last night 20 miles for 5 minutes.  My heart beat was so fast and my legs about doubled over.  I am out of shape.  He said to do it 10 miles / 5 minutes for a month and then go to 20 / 5 minutes.  Plus I should swim a lot.  I wonder where I can swim cheap.  Got any ideas?  I am writing this while waiting for Bob.  He has real problems.  His only leg is dying and he will probably do surgery will is they can't do a by-pass.  The question is can he survive a by-pass?
he is at least a 6 hour one and of the aorta and renal arteries.  He is having more tests now plus x-rays and blood work to determine if his heart can take it.  He is in a catch 22 and the prognosis is bad.
I have to stand by him no matter what.  We go out together and he eats in my apartment.  He is depressed.  His Dad died at 44 with CA of rectum.  He even died of CA breat and his mom had CA breast.  Now has has severe rectal pain and blood.  I am worried.
I am home now and about to leave for church for Ash Wednesday services.  Bob is sleeping.
I have yours and Kirstie's birthday presents and will try and mail them this week.  I hope they fit and you like them.
Take care of yourself.  Write or call.  I love you dearly and miss you.  See you soon.

All my love,
Mom
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