Dear Sally,
Thank you so much for the bread that arrived today. Sandy was so thrilled with the pillow. It is beautiful. How much do I owe you? I don't know what the postage was. The Safeway brand bread molded but the others are fine so we will just have to use the Orpwest brand. I had it tonight for my supper. It was so good.
The divorce hearing was Monday and the judge is taking a week to a month to look it over and make his decision. It is Heavenly Father's care. I haven't seen the girls since March 11 last year. Last night I had a severe attack of TIA or minor stroke. Sandy called my parents but I lost consciousness. I was fine up until it happened and it lasted several hours. I came to and refused to go to the hospital but I scared Sandy to death. She was awake all night and I read scriptures until 3 AM. I have made arrangements to go to Ann Arbor University of Michigan the Wed the 6th. I am really concerned and I strongly want to see the girls but Garry won't let me and I am afraid to tell him my debilitation condition as he will think he can get Sandy. She is slipping way down in school and I don't think she cares. I have lost the use of my right hand and borrowed this typewriter from a friend and it is electric. I never took typing so it is all left finger punch. Please excuse. I really can spell!!! I am at the end of my money and really worried. The church here is unhelpful. I miss all of you so much. The Bishop still hasn't sent Sacrament to me and I requested it over 2 months ago. My Visiting teacher brought in one meal. The apartment is dirty and I can do nothing by myself. Sandy is really nasty and lazy and has a constant mess. I can't inspire her to get moving and she thinks she will pass but I fear she won't. She doesn't go to school like she is supposed to. She is afraid that she will have to go to Garry. At times I think she acts this way so she can go. I feel so guilty for being an invalid and unable to go anywhere with her. She lives a lonely life. I just called Garry to beg him to let me see the girls and I guess he won't. Betsy has lots of trouble with asthma. My money will be gone when I pay the rent and I will have to borrow from someone. I have never been in this position before. Sally, I love you and I want you to know how much you and your family mean to me. I wish I had taken your advise long before and I might not be in this sickness. Sandy is trying to diet but she blows it but she doesn't have will power (not like me). I wrote Jodie yesterday. She sent a card. Ash her what I said about the church here. I still have a strong testimony and it is what gets me through each day. I will enclose a check for $6 and if it was more which I bet it was, please let me know. You don't know how much I appreciate it. The bread will help my bowels as I have a terrible time with them being in the wheel chair all the time. So how are the children? How is Mike's business doing? I think of you so much. Give my love to everyone as I miss them all. Tell the sisters to write me and give me some encouragement. I get depressed at times and try so hard not to question why this has all happened to me. Thank you for the pamphlets. I am grateful for them. I am trying to read Jesus the Christ. I wish I had it on tapes. So how is Ginny doing? Sandy misses her and never gets to writing anyone. She needs motivation. I am sure my condition is depressing her and she is afraid. Our weather goes from 80 to 50 during the day. We had a tornado touch down Tuesday evening and supposed to take shelter. I had to stay where I was as I couldn't go down the stairs. I am really at a loss without my legs plus my right hand. I get so frustrated. I can't bathe or wash or comb my hair. I think I will have someone come to the house and cut it really short so I have no care. It is so thick and getting long. It is a real handful. It takes 5 minutes for water to reach the scalp. You remember how thick it was and I have had it cut short 2 times since I came here. I have so much hair for everyone. I must do, things right to go hair and so thick. Sandy take 2 1/2 grains Synthroid/day and is still tired. I take a grain. Do you still take 1 1/2? My toenail came off last month and I have been on antibiotics 3 times and it does not heal because they are blocking the blood to my feet and legs. Now it is affecting by brain supply. I hope that Ann Arbor can and will help me. I feel that the answer is bilateral above the knee amputation so I can live again. Well, I will close and get ready for bed. I sleep a lot lately but have trouble getting to bed and asleep. I take a lot of calcium and magnesium and drink milk. I want to thank you again for the trouble of getting my bread here. I'll let you know when I need it again. Take care of yourself and write soon. Love you always.
Your friend forever,
Judy
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